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Do you wonder how you might feel after placing your baby for adoption? Have you made an adoption plan and are struggling with unexpected emotions?

Adoption is a lifelong decision for everyone involved in the adoption (biological parents, adoptive parents and the child). You might expect that once the adoption has been finalized in court, biological parents should be able to go back to life as normal, as though nothing has happened. However, many women and men who have made an adoption plan experience a period of sadness or grief – even when they are confident the adoption was the best plan for their child and them. The feelings of sadness or grief may also resurface on special dates such as the baby’s birthday, or the anniversary of the adoption. While adoption is a very loving and selfless decision, it can also be very difficult. Women and men who have made adoption plans for their child may need to grieve the loss they feel for the baby. These emotions are normal and justified. There are resources out there that can help you work through their grief and loss.

It might be helpful for you to keep a special scrap book or journal that can be written in or reviewed when these feelings come up. Sometimes talking about the baby or the adoption process to a trusted friend or family member is helpful. Usually the agency that helped you make the adoption plan has post adoption services available so that you can meet with an adoption professional to work through your feelings.